Saturday, May 3, 2014

SPRING MAILBAG #2

Editor's Note: Our post about "Dannie's Excellent Adventure" must have touched a nerve -- or drawn blood: We received a puffed-up and preachy e-mail from a huffy sede priest who hitched a ride on the back end of "One Hand's" latest junket to sun drenched Mexico. The e-mail, written in Spanish and captioned Aclaración ("clarification, explanation"), wasn't addressed to the Reader, so it automatically went into spam. It was only by chance our webmaster saw it before deleting the other trash. We have translated the relevant parts and appended the original in the footnotes (exactly as we received it).
…Bp. Dolan’s trip was financed by Fr. Hernán Vergara and his parishioners. They have sufficient economic means for this and more. As a result, the priests who belonged to the Trento society have sought out and asked for the help of Bp. Dolan in order to work with him.*
All that may be true, but if we were "Gerties," we'd insist on seeing the documentation proving the Baja group paid for the (1) airfare to and from the U.S., (2) air and ground transportation in Mexico, (3) food, (4) lodging, and (5) gratuities for the La-Paz leg of the tour as well as for the rest of the vacation, viz., (1) the sojourn in Mexico City, (2) the "medical tourism" excursion to Puebla, and (3) the round-trip jaunt to Vera Cruz state. In addition, we would want to know who paid the expenses of our e-mail correspondent, a Chilean by birth, who resides -- the last time we heard -- near the U.S.-Mexico border.

Remember, boys and girls: declaring those good folks have the means to underwrite Li'l Dan's spring vacation doesn't mean they actually did.

Without receipts showing who paid what, this sycophant's "clarification" clears up nothing.  As a defense, it's worthless ... of no probative value whatsoever. It simply invites more questions. From long experience, we're all familiar with the sedes' tiresome mental reservation and equivocation. Only genuine receipts can support this contemptible lickspittle's insinuation, for it taxes belief that the people of Baja underwrote Dannie's excellent adventure in its entirety, including the reprehensible Lenten red-meat-eating frenzy at a swanky Argentine steak house in the capital.

That's an awful lot of money for an international trip that was as unnecessary as it was wasteful. Several thousand dollars buys a lot in Mexico. As we've noted before, the Mexican priests didn't have to use "One Hand" if  they didn't want the Trento bishop or, as the case probably stands, he didn't want to have anything to do with them. There are plenty of other bishops around down there. And if those worthies balked, the priests themselves have the power to confirm.

Truly, it would've been better for the Baja and Vera Cruz faithful if their own priests had conducted the confirmations. As you all know, it's not only possible, but also in the realm of probability, that "One Hand" may not be a priest (and hence is not a bishop). What a crying shame if they squandered their precious resources on an invalid sacrament, when their own clergy could have confected it validly at no cost at all.

For the sake of discussion, despite the utter absence of tangible proof, we won't categorically dismiss the brown-nosing Chilean's claim that the Baja chapel contributed to Dannie's Lenten holiday spree. The good folks down there could well have paid for only the first leg of Travelin' Man Dan's spring break, say, the round-trip flight from Mexico City plus the Baja lodging amidst fragrant laurel trees and swaying coconut and date palms.

However, without first seeing receipts, we definitely will not take the word of any pants-on-fire cultish priestling -- especially one of "One Hand's" untrustworthy lackeys -- that the good folks of Baja paid for the whole spring-fling. From what we've learned of this loudmouth troublemaker,** we don't believe he was moved to write to Pistrina on his own. In fact, we don't believe he'd ever read us at all. Somebody else must surely have put a nervous bug in his servile ear.

We're convinced the pressure on Panhandlin' Dan is increasing at the SW Ohio cult center. Some very knowledgeable sources inform us that the SGG cult established a separate fund to pay off the staggering winter heating bill. By all accounts, quite a few folks down there have grown weary of the incessant appeals for more and more money to bail out the high-living big spenders. There are also credible reports that attendance is suffering, too.

Now, if the few conscious "Gerties" think that "One Hand Dan" spent any cult money at all -- even his own -- on the Mexican escape while he knew of the outstanding heating bill, they would be very upset. Hardworking families understand when there's a crisis at home, that's where all resources belong. In a financial crisis, the whole family makes sacrifices for its survival.

Many "Gerties" will have to cancel or curtail their vacations this year because of their own sky-high household fuel bills. Unlike the cult masters, they've got no one stupid enough to bail them out. Had Dannie cared about his raggedy flock, he'd have known that people have enough trouble as it is meeting their monthly bills without his high-pressuring them for more and more money. If St. Gertrude's is a "family," as Dannie loves to say, why can't ol' Pops sacrifice a bit, too?

Consequently, before Deacon Dan demands more cash, he owes his folks -- both the spinning imbeciles and the casually deluded -- a detailed, day-by-day explanation (with all documentation attached) of where the money came from for both his Mexican adventure and his earlier escapade down Argentine way. A toad-eating errand boy's petulant complaint to Pistrina is no substitute, especially when the absence of documentation renders its veracity questionable.

Unless His Unaccountability can produce unimpeachable records to prove that his hosts paid for all travel expenses for both vacations, then the "Gerties" are morally obliged to withhold support for the next bail-out appeal, which will be coming soon. The money flushed down the toilet on these two ego-titillating getaways would have paid the SGG's winter fuel bills and then some.


TO BE CONTINUED...








* "El viaje de Mgr.Dolan, fue costeado por P.Hernán Vergara y su feligresía. Ellos, tienen los medios económicos suficientes para eso y más. Por lo cual,los Sacerdotes que pertenecieron a la Sociedad Trento, han buscado y solicitado la asistencia de Mgr.Dolan para trabajar con él."


** This clownish windbag used to pass himself off as Dannie Boy's "deputy" in Mexico. In that capacity, he caused a lot of trouble with his hot temper and Little-Miss-Bossy-Boots ways. Perhaps one day we'll tell the story of the trouble he fomented in Cuernavaca with a refined priest from Argentina. This intemperate clerical clod does not like Argentineans one bit (although he seems to have no objections to their excellent beef cuisine, especially at Lent). 

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